by Esther Velez (May 2018)

This is what a nightmare is:
To laugh with the ones you love
To look into their eyes
But now it’s not a face you know
It’s a stranger

And this is what living is:
You said we’d never see you again
But you’re everywhere
In the songs I love
In the things I say
In the back of my mind

Why can’t I wash free the stain of you?
You’re a tangled shadow I can’t escape
And a fading moment I can’t erase.

When will we ever be free of you?
You’re in the memories I can’t change
And the ones I want to keep the same.

This is what a nightmare is:
To walk with the ones you love
To look into their eyes
But now it’s not a face you know
It’s a stranger
A cruel stranger

If this is a nightmare
And I forget when I wake up
And things go back to how they were
Does that leave her there?
Where she can’t wake up?
And things are back to how they were?

If I go back to being in the dark
Does that mean she has to stay there?